7 quick takes, pacifiers, random miscellany

7 Quick Takes: Pacifier Madness Edition

Because I know you’ve all been holding your breath to know how the glucose test turned out on Tuesday, I’m going to report on that first.

I don’t have gestational diabetes.

I know we could have dealt with it and managed just fine for the next 9 weeks or so, but I’m glad ecstatic that I don’t have to think about counting carbs and testing my blood sugar four times a day. It would just be one more thing, you know? My brain feels kind of full most days already.

We celebrated the news by eating a bunch of sugary yogurt with even sugarier toppings from Sweet Frog. (Do you have Sweet Frog? I feel sad if you don’t.)

Speaking of full brains, I’ve been wishing Dumbledore’s pensieve was a real thing that I could order on Amazon. I really, really need one. I have all these lists of things…stuff we need to do before the baby comes, things I need to take with me when I leave the house, errands I need to run, questions I need to remember to ask George. Sometimes in the middle of the night, I get up and “empty my brain” onto a piece of paper so I won’t have to lie there trying not to forget anything.

It seems like a terrible waste of energy. And paper.

I use the Pensieve. One simply siphons the excess thoughts from one’s mind, pours them into the basin, and examines them at one’s leisure. It becomes easier to spot patterns and links, you understand, when they are in this form.” 

Yes. This would be much more efficient.

One thing on my mind lately is the children’s 6 month dental appointment. So far, no one has had any cavities, but we go regularly so that Sam can have a cleaning and the girls can get used to the idea that one day they, too, will have their teeth cleaned.

It’s never boring.

The appointment was supposed to be on Tuesday, but since I was busy vacationing at the midwives’ office for the glucose test, I rescheduled for later this month. Our favorite babysitter is going along to be the extra set of hands (ever tried to wrangle 3 children ages five and under while someone tries to get them to open their mouths wide and starts touching their teeth? It. Is. Madness.) I’ve promised to treat everyone to Chick Fil-A afterward if we survive…but I already know the biggest hurdle we have to face will be before we arrive at the office that day.

The dreaded moment has arrived. It’s time to get rid of the girls’ pacifiers.

I know, I know. They’re 2 1/2. I should have done away with the pacis (or “passas,” as the girls call them) long ago. My sister told me so. “You’ve got to get rid of them early or it’s going to be even worse,” she said, having survived the process with her own daughter.

I should have listened. I was weak. I made excuses. “They only use them when they sleep,” I said, which is true- they turn the passas in when they get up, and I stash them in a high place where they are out of reach. Somehow, I thought only using them for sleeping would make it easier to ditch them when the time came.

(What was I thinking?)

Sam never used a pacifier, and I would have naively said then that people shouldn’t use them. Funny how having twins changed that know-it-all feeling I used to have. The pacifiers have been lifesavers. I’m indebted to them, really.

Did you ever see the old film Reefer Madness? It was all about how smoking marijuana made this group of respectable teenagers insane…they danced! to jazz music! how scandalous! and someone ended up getting shot, I think. Totally over the top craziness- it ended up becoming a cult classic.

No pacifiers. You’ll regret it one day.

Anyway, I can’t help thinking that we are in our own film- Paci Madness. It starts out fine enough…harmless little latex nipples with cute plastic rings on them that help the babies sleep. They don’t cry. They suck happily and drift off to dreamland. The parents sigh contentedly and smile at each other as they snuggle into their own bed, happy to be getting such wonderful rest. It’s all thanks to the paci.

And then…the paci madness starts.

The babies start throwing the pacis. They scream and demand that the parents come and pick them up. The parents drag themselves out of bed two, three, even four times in the night to retrieve the little lost opiates so that everyone can go back to sleep.

At just past two years of paci use, this is where we are.

The time has come to say goodbye to the pacis.

Besides, I know that in a few weeks, the dentist will ask if they are still using them, and I really want to be able to say, “No! They gave those up!” I’m pretty sure I get some kind of Good Mama Award if I do that, right?

Please, friends…pray for us. I think this could get ugly.

To replace the pacifiers, we told the girls they could choose “a special friend,” which is their name for a stuffed animal.

Where would they like to go to look for these special friends?

IKEA, of course.

I think Lucy and Nora have been to IKEA once since they were old enough to remember, but they talk about it all the time. They push their babies in their strollers and say they’re going to IKEA. They drive their Duplo guys in cars and say they are going to IKEA. I’m not sure what IKEA did to make them customers for life, but they got these girls early.

Anyway, I think we’re going this weekend for the special friends and random other pre-baby needs: plastic mattress covers, hooks for towels, a small bookshelf, a lamp.

And probably meatballs. (Why are those so good?)

I guess we could view quitting the pacifiers as a milestone of sorts, just one I’d rather not have to experience.

Other milestones are much more pleasant. Every time we finish a read-aloud book with Sam, it feels like kind of a milestone, too- the kind you fondly note in someone’s baby book (or their homeschool reading log!). We finished Peter Pan this week and are ready to move on to our next book. After some discussion, it seems like it will be Charlie and the Chocolate Factory this time.

This post by Micaela made me think. Are we introducing some of these books too soon? Having an advanced reader in the house is challenging- he wants to read better and harder stories all the time, and usually we try to have our read-alouds be things he might not be ready to tackle on his own. I try to guide him toward things that he’s emotionally ready to handle and that won’t overwhelm him. Peter Pan was racier than I remembered- we had to skip some parts when we were reading aloud- but he loved the story and the pirates and the excitement. I know he’ll read the book again in a few years when he’s more mature because he was so fond of it. I don’t want him to be forced to only read The Magic Treehouse books for the next few years until his maturity catches up a bit to his reading level…but I’m not willing to throw him into the deep end with books that he’s not ready to handle.

For now, I think it’s okay that some of the language and some of the themes in what we read aloud together are going over his head. We’re laying a foundation and fostering a love for great language and good stories and deep, interesting characters. It’s okay if he doesn’t get every detail right now.

George is doing another running streak this year. Last year, I participated, too…we ran at least a mile a day every day from Memorial Day to Independence Day. It was challenging, fun, and motivating, and it helped lay the groundwork for my marathon training.

This year, I’m jealous of the running streak (or really, of anyone who can run at all). My joints are super loose this pregnancy- my hips have been popping in and out of joint just from ordinary activities of daily living, so I can’t chance any running until a while after this baby is born. I miss it so much. I think running functions kind of like the pensieve for me…a place to deposit thoughts and sort them out.

The endorphins are nice, too.

At least I have some labor-related endorphins to look forward to…and the running days will be back eventually. Still, if you’re one of those people posting every day about your mileage on social media, please don’t be upset if I stop commenting on your posts for a bit. It’s not personal. I’m just sad without my own miles to claim…and you don’t want me to compensate by starting to post about how many poopy diapers I rinsed off every day.

Hey, maybe now that we are getting rid of the pacifiers, we can tackle that potty training thing in earnest!

As always, thanks to Jen, our amazing host.
For more Quick Takes, visit her at Conversion Diary!

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